Wednesday 31 August 2011

Back with a bump

I don't want to be back in the UK. Three days after landing at Heathrow and I can honestly say that the holiday blues have very much set in. Lame.

Besides the very satisfying feeling of being able to cross off Visit Australia from my 2011 'must do' list, which is of course fantastic, it's amazing how quickly all my worries and stresses about every day life have returned. For the first day and a bit I continued to try and ride the wave of good holiday feelings and took myself off to Nottinghill Carnival to catch up with friends and my brother and his girlfriend. Then yesterday I cruised around and got coffee before heading to Camden with brother and his gf, chilling out, eating good food and spending money willy-nilly (yes you did read that right, I in fact just used the phrase willy-nilly and I don't care how old or middle class that makes me sound).

It's been good times and I wouldn't change any of it, but then this morning I had a bill to pay, so then checked my account balance and there's nothing like seeing your post-holiday bank account to really bring you back down to earth. Bollocks - I'm sure living on £14 a day between now and pay-day will be doable right? I fucking hate thinking about money.

But then of course all this money worry leads me straight back to the whole thing about finding a job I enjoy - a 2011 list goal that I'm not sure I'll achieve by the end of the year - or even what I want to do for a career. Then I end up getting frustrated and starting to feel anxious about going back to work on Friday (yep the summer hols are nearly over) and it's just all a load of crap and reaffirms that the Quarterlife Crisis continues and I've not got such a good hold on it as I thought I did. *Sigh* Perhaps today will be put to good use of cruising a few more job sites. 

To top it all off I think I'm still a bit jet lagged as I've been waking up at stupid o' clock the last few days, so feeling grumpy as fuck about that too. Argh! Where's that Duty Free rum to help knock me out?!

 Moan over. I'll attempt to be a bit more upbeat and positive from here on out.

RoseC -x-

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